iAm Not The One
by Alexia Astraea
Summary: It was the day he had always dreamed about - his first date with Carly Shay. Then why didn't this feel right? Perhaps Carly can help him realize his feelings. ---Pre-Seddie, Freddie/Carly-friendship---


Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly. I'm only the author of a humble fanfic.

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It was something he dreamed about for _years_. His first love across the table from him, casually dressed up, smiling at him with those pearly whites and kind eyes. Her precious face made him uneasy as he shifted in his chair and raised his menu to cover his face.

He had always expected to be slightly uncomfortable on their first date but… he always expected it to be from nerves. Fumbling with somewhat awkward conversation, anxious before the moment when they would enviably kiss, and then finally feel this overwhelming relief and happiness as the dark brunette would fall into his side and they would walk down the streets of Seattle completely in their own world.

Perhaps, the thing that made him the most uncomfortable was the fact that this uneasiness he felt _wasn't_ for the reasons he previously anticipated. All he could do was peak over the menu, see the joyful and _kind_ eyes of Carly Shay and wonder why in the known universe he wasn't grinning like an idiot. Or why the "butterflies" in his stomach felt more like knots. Idiot-grins and butterflies, that's how it's supposed to be when you're on your first date with the girl of your dreams right?

"Are you ready to order?" The waiter asked politely, snapping Freddie out of his thoughts.

"Yes, I am." Carly said smoothly and looked over toward Freddie, "You?"

"Yes! O-of course." He said hastily, while quickly scanning over the menu. He couldn't really justify not being ready when he stared at the menu for the past ten minutes instead of his date.

The waiter looked at Freddie, expecting his orders, but soon turned to Carly. "As they say: ladies first." He said with the best smile he could muster to hide his slight annoyance towards his obviously unprepared customer.

Carly gave him an understanding smile, trying to excuse her friend, before giving her order to the man.

He nodded and turned to the techie, pen and pad in hand. "And you, sir?"

"Uhh… Spaghetti and meatballs please."

The waiter nodded. "And the sauce?"

"Uh! Red! Red's fine!" He replied quickly, caught off guard, he didn't know they had different type of sauces. In reality, there was hardly time for him to _actually_ look at the menu. Freddie saw 'meatballs' and thought it was exactly what he wanted, he didn't waste time looking over the details.

"Tomato sauce… Of course. How very… original." The waiter replied un-amused. "Soup or salad?"

"Uh… Soup."

"And what kind?"

"Chili."

The waiter stared at him for a few seconds, wondering if he was serious, before finally giving a nod. "Chili… It… Is…" He muttered back while taking their menus and leaving.

Carly let out a small laugh. "Freddie! You typically don't want to annoy the waiter. You never know, he could spit in your food or something."

A rush of heat rose to his cheeks. "Yeah… I guess you're right."

Carly looked around, "Y'know in a place like this they kinda expect you to be prepared."

The restaurant wasn't exactly first class dining, but it was definitely a step up from the Cheesecake Warehouse. Okay, maybe more than a step up. It was fancy enough that some conducted business dinners here but not so fancy that a fifteen year old couldn't afford it. (Especially when he's been saving for such an event.) Convention even called for both of them to be somewhat dressed up. Him in a nice pair of slacks and her in a dress.

She looked cute in her dark blue dress. Her hair was half pulled back into a loose bun and he could tell she took a little longer to put on her makeup. Cute, simply adorable, and her bright eyes completed the picture perfectly. Perfect. Yes, that's what this night was supposed to be. He shook his head slightly, no the date _is_ going perfectly, he mentally corrected.

He quickly smiled as Carly returned her eyes back to his. She smiled ever so slightly and turned her head slightly down. Her hands covered her grinning mouth and she perked back up. "Freddie are you okay? You're never this quiet." She asked with an unusual upbeat concern.

Freddie let out a small smile. Actually, upbeat concern would be unusual coming from anyone but Carly. I mean she was the nice one, the one that gave him kind smiles of support and encouragement. Treated him with concern when needed. Yes, she always treated him with the sweetness and gentleness of a dear friend. How could she not be his dream girl?

I mean she never teased him, or publicly mock him. Never pulled cruel stunts on him. Never seemed to get a sick sort of perverse pleasure from his embarrassment. No, Carly never really challenged him, never pushed him to be something more. Never got him to the point where he could feel the blood coursing through his body from sheer frustration yet excitement. Nor was she able to get him to that exhilarating moment where the girl before him just seemed to push _all the right buttons_ and he would have to fight his body's urge to just grab her face and taste those sweet lips once more, with even more vigor than their first kiss.

"Freddie?" Carly asked while waving her hand in front of Freddie's face.

"Huh..!" Freddie snapped back, "S-sorry Carly. I was… was just thinking about how cute you look tonight!" He half-lied. At least it started out that way, he justified to himself.

Carly simply nodded, gave another radiant smile, and leaned back into her chair. "Thanks." She replied in her normal tone and continued to grin, her eyes sparkling what seemed like amusement.

Amusement…? Wait. Why would she be amused?

"You must be finding it really difficult to think of a conversation. You should have seen your face." She said with a small giggle.

"My face?" He repeated with skepticism.

"Yeah. Your face was going through all these different expressions. Even your eyes, it was kinda funny."

Freddie loosened up. "I guess I can see how that would be amusing." He said with a small, understanding, smile.

Carly nodded with a grin, "You have _no_ idea!"

Dinner came and Freddie was happy for the temporary distraction. But after the waiter left, and the few minutes he took to inspect his small bowl of chili and pasta for any spit (just in case), it was back to silence. Which… didn't make sense. Why _was_ he having a hard time talking to Carly? It wasn't the nerves, because those seemed to be hiding at the moment.

Nerves… hiding… Heh, he must've been the envy of all the dating-men in the world. However, it only proved his slowly emerging conclusion: this date simply didn't feel right.

Freddie looked across the table to see the fork and knife eagerly tear off another piece of the beautifully plated and well-carved ham slices.

"Sam…" Freddie mumbled.

Maybe it was because he hardly spoke so far during the date and Carly's ears were straining to hear any _tiny_ audio sound coming from him that her head suddenly perked up. "Excuse me?" She asked in her normal chipper tone, eyes glimmering.

Freddie fumbled, how could he get out of this one? "You ordered ham. I-I don't know… For some reason I associate that dish with Sam."

Carly smiled, "You're right!" She beamed while looking back at her plate. "I heard this place had excellent ham, so I _had_ to try it. But, y'know, I bet Sam would love to come here too."

Freddie smiled and imagined how that would be. "I don't think my wallet could handle it. She would've torn through that ham and be moving onto course number two by now."

Carly laughed, "Yeah. I bet she would be stealing your chili and taking stabs at your pasta and meatballs."

Freddie nodded and laughed, he could see her doing that too. "Yeah. I'm sure she would, and I'd probably get annoyed."

"More than annoyed. I can totally see you giving her _that _look."

"Heh. Yeah but then she'd punch me in the arm and force me to give them to her."

Carly frowned slightly, "You think? With this setting?"

Freddie smiled, "You're right it might be one of those brief times when she lets out her softer side. Heh, maybe she would silently beg for the food with that rare big puppy-dog look she gives me sometimes." He involuntarily shuttered, just the thought of the look made him weak in the knees.

Carly smiled brightly, "I can see that." She said more softly as she noticed Freddie's eyes going into his processing mode – thinking about possibilities.

They continued to eat their meals in contented silence, Freddie processing all the information (hopefully correctly) and Carly patiently waiting for him to reach the obvious conclusion.

"Well, that's not going to happen." He finally concluded as Carly sipped her water. She had to catch herself from spitting it out - she didn't want to be kicked out of the restaurant after all.

"W-what do you mean that's not going to happen?!" She asked, shock evident in her voice.

"Why would it?" Freddie answered back almost-sadly while looking at his spaghetti. "I mean... You're my dream girl after all." He said while looking back up at her, a smile plastered on his face. "The one I wanted for all these years..."

Carly frowned. Maybe that fake smile on his face convinced him that this was a done-deal, but it definitely wasn't convincing her. She took a silent deep breath. This would have to be done _delicately_.

"Well, I'm glad... I mean... I kinda had my doubts."

"Doubts?"

"Well… You haven't talked much all night and the one time we're able to get a conversation going it was about..." Carly gave Freddie a small glance; he had to be the one to realize this.

"Sam…" He said softly.

Carly gave a small laugh, "I mean even your meal selection: meatballs and chili, those are kinda foods I associate with…"

"Sam…" He said while looking down at his food, realization hitting his face.

Carly had to restrain her small smile from leaking; after all, it wasn't a guarantee that he completely understood.

"And then after that small conversation you kinda went off, day-dreaming. It just gave the impression that you were thinking about…"

"Sam.." He couldn't even look at Carly now, instead his dark orbs were looking down at the table, just processing all this input.

"Heh; if you _really_ think about it, even this conversation, the second one we _really_ had all night, is about…"

"Sam." He finally said with certainly as he finally looked back to her.

The expression of pain on his face both took her back and kicked in her sympathetic side. "Exactly…" She said softly as she reached for his hand.

"I… I'm…" He tore his eyes away from her; an overwhelming feeling of guilt prevented himself from enjoying her understanding smile.

"Hey, don't worry about it. There's nothing to be sorry about." She said in her cheery voice.

Freddie risked a glance at her.

"Like you said, I'm the one you _wanted_; I'm just not the one you _want_." She beamed.

He closed his eyes and a small smile made its way on his face. What else could he say? She was right, and she knew it _all this time_. He opened his eyes and his brows frowned slightly. "Were you planning this the entire time?"

"Yes." Came the straightforward reply. "What? I didn't want guilt eating at me!" She further explained upon receiving a surprised then skeptic look. "Although, you pretty much did everything yourself. I just… pointed it out to you." She said with a shrug and a grin.

Freddie nodded, "Yeah… Smart." He stared at his meatballs and chili, now seeing them as having a much more significant meaning. "Thanks. Y'know… for being such a great friend."

Carly smiled back. "Sure! … … … You're still paying for the meal though."

Freddie smirked, "Heh, sure."

**END**

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**_A/N_: That's the end of my first iCarly fic! Thank you for reading.

Reviews are always appreciated but I'm content in just sharing the story for others to enjoy.


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